Single dad

We at GreatDad.com are big believers in breastfeeding and strongly urge you to do all you can to support mom. The first meals, especially, can be a challenge as milk may not come in right away. The baby may not know what to do and the mom, if she has not breastfed before, may be equally lost.

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Your spouse will have put on weight gain during the pregnancy. While this is normal, many women worry about this increase in their weight following delivery.

 These are important things your spouse needs to know if she is trying to lose weight:

• Weight gain may be normal: It is important for your spouse to determine whether the weight she has gained is within normal limits. Pregnancy weight gain of anywhere between 15 to 30 pounds is absolutely normal and she need not worry about it. However, if she weighs over 30 pounds more than before she became pregnant, she may need to consider losing some of it.
• Weight loss needs to be gradual: There is no truth in the popular belief that successful weight loss program has to be speedy. Actually post-pregnancy weight gain may take up to years to reverse and is dependent on many factors.
• ‘Quick fix’ methods do not work: Doctors do not generally recommend any quick techniques or drastic diets to lose weight following pregnancy.

Your spouse can effectively lose weight by:

• Staying away from any ‘fad’ diets likely to harm herself and, if she is breastfeeding, the baby
• Combining a healthy diet plan with a sensible exercise routine
• Aiming for a reasonable loss that she can maintain, rather than a drastic loss that is short-lived
• Consulting a dietician if her own efforts do not show results

Returning to normal

During pregnancy, your spouse’s body went through tremendous changes. Now that she has given birth, she will experience more changes as her body returns to its normal state.

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If your child suffers from itching around the anus, it could be an indication of pinworms. These are tiny white worms, about a quarter of an inch long, that commonly affect toddlers and older children. The commonest warning sign of pinworm infestation is an annoying itch around the anus that seems to worsen at night.

Children usually are infected by picking up pinworm eggs on their hands, and then swallowing the eggs when they put their hand in the mouths. The eggs hatch inside the intestine from where female worms come out to lay eggs on the anus. Pinworms do not pose a health hazard to your child, nor does an infestation indicate a lack of hygiene.

If you suspect that your child is infected, you can:

• Physically examine your child’s rectum at night using a flashlight, to see if you can spot the worms.
• Look for their presence in your child’s stools.
• Press a clear sticky tape on your child’s anal skin; if your child has pinworms, your pediatrician will be able to see the eggs that are stuck on the tape.

Once the diagnosis for pinworms is confirmed, the pediatrician will prescribe medication to kill the worms. You may also be required to wash your baby’s bedding, clothes, and toys with hot water to destroy the eggs.

These are ways in which you can prevent a pinworm infestation in your child:

• Keep your child’s nails well trimmed to prevent eggs from lodging between them.
• Advocate hygienic habits such as washing hands before eating.
• Do not allow your child to develop habits such as biting nails or sucking fingers.
• Keep the floor of your house clean by vacuuming it regularly.

While naming their children, parents often choose names with an ethnic origin. This trend has gained popularity also in the US, a melting pot of people from various ethnicities living together. Names such as Rosalie, Maxime, Kamal, or Galina no longer raise eyebrows.

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Dealing with a divorce that includes children may be the most difficult thing you ever do. Here are some general tips that might help guide you.

1. Listen carefully. Now is the time to make an extra effort to put down the paper or turn off the TV when the kids wants to talk.
2. Honesty counts. During the divorce, don’t make up stories about why ‘daddy is away.' Lies, even if you think they will protect the kids, are not a good foundation for the change in your family.
3. Don't’ forget about you. If you feel better, you’ll be better with your kids during this challenging period. Get lots of exercise and spend time with caring friends and family.
4. Ask your child about friends who have divorced parents. This is a good icebreaker to get them talking and learn their fears and feelings about divorce. Then you can answer them and focus on what’s most important to them.
5. Consider children’s books about divorce. You might not have the vocabulary to talk about divorce or find it awkward when it’s so personal. Children’s books are a good way to open up dialogue with littler children.
6. Don’t blame your kids, or let them think in any way that they are to blame. Most kids will feel this anyway.
7. Be sensitive to your child’s vulnerability at this time. Over-sized fears of monsters or robbers are common during this time. Make sure you also reassure your kids that you will always be there to support them and that means home, food, and security. That might seem silly to you, but it is very important for a child who may obsess over things they have heard or imagine about divorce.
8. Be aware that it’s normal for kids to want their parents to get back together again. You may have to hear about this fantasy for many years. Do not indulge the fantasy, but make sure they do not feel ashamed or silly for wishing that it could be true.
9. Allow your kids to express their feelings. They may be mad or sad. It’s important that they know this is okay.
10. Don’t put your child in the middle of anything between you and your ex-wife. Don’t ask your child to spy. Don't say hateful things about your ex-wife. Don't have your child act as a messenger to your wife. Neglecting this can be very harmful for the child since they need to love both parents and should not have to choose sides.